“why the hell didn’t you send the balance sheet till now --- I want it at the table now.” ----phooof ---- I am tired – shit I am tired – I don’t know why I just shouted like a demon from hell --- but looking at my reflection in the spick and span office that I have made for myself--- I see a tyrant – no longer liked by anyone – my marriage ain’t working –and nor do I really know my kids –I see someone who has given the best years of his life to work –only to find at the end – that he is at the same point as 20yrs back --- I feel despise for myself --- I don’t know I didn’t want this – I started as a merry young man – willing to dream big and work for it ---- but I ended up as this – I don’t know --…

“sir , the balance sheet.” ---“hey listen – I am sorry – have no right to shout at you like that – forgive me if u can, please “ ---“ you can go now ,thank you”,

looking down at the vast city sky line extending beyond my eyes – I see only failure --- the more people are scared of facing their realities – of staying on the ground --- the higher they make the buildings --- and people would pay anything to stay somewhere –which doesn’t make them realize who they really are – as am I – a mere pawn in this game – the society stifles me and I am forced to take shelter in height – and so I remain -comfortable in my own cocoon –knowing – yet not knowing that I am a refugee – on the run from my own country –the level ground and taking the abode of the birds ---

a knock wakes me up from my reverie --- “ come in “ ---- “sir, you have an appointment in 15 minutes, Mr gupta has called for conformation , and sir just a reminder – u have appointments lined up for the whole afternoon”

------ “hmm –listen cancel all my appointments for today and tell everyone that tomorrow’s a holiday – anyway kumar how’s your daughter --- and family “ -------“fine sir I’ll do that –sir and yeah my family is pretty happy – so is my daughter, thank you sir“

---- -“ yeah well, god bless you” ---

I cant take it anymore --- its stupid while my own family is breaking up –this guy has a happy family – and they told me – money could cure anything – how stupid – here I am at this point in my life – where I feel more dead than alive – where I dread waking up – since I would have to face the world – where I am still required to pretend in a stupid world that I am respectable and happy man --- I cant share my unhappiness – since I cant tell young people that money will not necessarily make you happy --- u know what I am going to do – I am going to exactly tell people that how screwed up it can get -------------------------------

Next day newspaper --- headlines ---

Shocking news --- gruesome incident --

Mr kedia commits suicide – throws himself with car over bridge – elaborate suicide letter found – company manager inherits billions from him --- family refusing to comment --- son reported to have said he was expecting it , reportedly brawled on hearing loss of inheritance --- industry pays homage -------------------------------------------------------