Goodbye

It’s the end today. The day u are born – u are marked – u have become marked by that guy up there who is the ultimate nemesis of the human being – death – so today I embrace it – its my time today – it has come to me today – like it has come to countless individuals before me – and will keep coming after me – taking with itself – each of u – to whom this open letter of mine is addressed – a luxury death has allowed me –as a last wish …..

Its funny how when u look back at it – time seems to have run along and brought me to my fate here – I remember times in my life when I wanted things to rush along – my painful times –the times – I wanted to grow up too fast – but standing here all those awkward times – seem so artistically beautiful – I wanted them rushed – I couldn’t take them at all – but now I look at those times with longing – hoping that I have not had rushed them – wishing time – even full of pain – but time --- since if there is something that tells u u are alive –its pain – alive –what a weird word – an adjective I used to describe myself as for so long – but wouldn’t be able to anymore – but strangely –I feel so alive – so fresh –as if I have woken up after a lifetime of sleep – but alas too late – or not --…..

But if I look back at life – I see no regrets – even death has been favorable too me –taking me in its shelter – saving me from times I probably couldn’t take – I have lived a life only of youth – something not many people can say – I have seen only true honesty and friendship – maybe a glimpse of true love – I have not grown up enough to see treachery – to see old friendships wither away against the many forces of life – I am content to have known life only in its most beautiful moments –

I would like to say thank you –a heartfelt one to all those souls – I have had the good fortune to connect with in this world here – I have received joy –un bound joy through all my encounters with all the people I have met – I hold no ill will against anyone in my life – I wish everybody all the best in there lives --- I can barely write this letter through my shaking hands --- but my heart cries out in gratitude – thank you everyone for the wonderful experience in life u have given me – all the beer parties pavan – all the nights dheeraj – the last minute scramble for assignments – the ETDS – workshops –the play itself – every one on the crew – the cut crew --- the governors – bhaatu of course –

-- all my school friends – my school teachers – rahul – man I am coming to meet u – just a few moments – all those stupidities in college – the gorai night out – nishi –all the fun we had – the stupid smoking up at 16 – thakur village – RD , bitu – dj – all of u u have contributed enormously to my life – I have had the good fortune – excellent fortune – of meeting u people – my parents of course – possibly the biggest influence in my life – u couldn’t have been better parents – my sister – my sweet sweet sister – I am going but remember – I am always there for u – for our connection cant be severed --all my teachers –whom I had the good fortune to meet --- nivie don’t I keep telling u I am the luckiest person on earth –well I am god dammit –I sure as hell am – cause I got to know u people -- I got to spend vital times with u guys – malini – my cute little sister – I will be looking over you from above – sweta – u and ur unlimited balance – heartfelt –u will have a blessed life – manisha – don’t be –ve – life is too good – believe me – and thanks for differential equation – hardika – well u are one happy person – stay that way – snob – well – santa – my last joke – u have an amazing attitude – but ur depressing times – can be a pain – believe in my favorite phrase --life rocks--- -- sashwat beta tu bada khush – hai khush hi rehna , dheeraj , pavan , nivie – I don’t even have to say anything to u since – I am so good at giving advice – u have been facing it for the last four months – but dheeraj remember – physicists are god – and mr niit diploma – u too remember it ……..

well don’t have too much time –I can taste blood – and for once.. – I cant even say see ya –cause I wont see ya – but – yes – may god put a smile on ur face –

ps ; don’t dare to cry for me – since the only thing – I am sad about – is getting separated from u guys – I fully intend to enjoy death as well – will miss u people forever and forever …….bye ---